Memory Bears and the Club No One Wants to Join
This blog post is a mix of real-life experiences as a publicity assistant and a child loss mom. I was reading a story written from another newspaper on how a mom had a stillborn daughter and the hospital gave her and her family a special bassinet that had a hidden cooling pad in it so she and the family could spend 48 hours with their deceased child. The story went on to say that they had the ashes of the deceased child placed into a memory bear keepsake that was created from the child’s siblings baby outfit and blanket.
The Broken Mother’s Club
It’s not a club any mom wants to join, yet it has members joining daily. The broken mother’s club is what it is called, yet rarely spoken about and as time goes on the members continue to grow and it changes everything because when it happens our first inclination is to shut everything out and not confront our reality because it’s too difficult. If members of the broken mother’s club were more open to honestly dealing with their personal grief and be willing to share their story with other’s who are new to the journey, perhaps we would be able to create an atmosphere where we don’t feel alone.
To Be Honest
To be honest, I was never a teddy bear person, until Hannah passed away, Then in 2002, I began a teddy bear ministry that was introduced to me through a distant cousin of mine. The difference between then and today is that I offer custom memory bear sewing services that are made from your clothing, whereas in the past I used to by ‘off the shelf’ teddy bears. Then this year something changed for me, it was after many years of prayers for a way to reach others with the Love and comfort of Christ through using my gifts and talents. There is still so much to be done in my memory care gift business and on many occasions, I have to step away from the computer and revisit my written plans just to be sure that what is happening is real. For example, the other day I was speaking with a fellow woman in business who juggles a completely different business than mine, and our paths crossed one day on Facebook when I posted a ‘job wanted’ sign on my wall. We got on the phone and spoke, though the opportunity she presented me was not a good fit, we were able to give one another idea for business outreach and growth.
It seems that everywhere you look there is a broken mom, they come in all shapes, sizes, ages, races, and from all walks of life. Some hold their heads up high while others are too weak to hold their heads up at all. Their grief can come from a loved one’s death, the loss of a friend, a pink slip from work, or any other broken relationship that can happen. The blog isn’t just about child loss or bereavement of a child, no, in fact, it’s about grief and learning to heal through any of the life’s promised grievances. One thing we can most likely agree about is that a real superwoman doesn’t wear a cape and a big ‘S’ on her chest…she most likely wears a fake smile and blends in with others. The Broken Mother’s club is open 24/7/365 and has new members entering every second of every day, and if we stop to look around our community I bet we will see a need for a real club that offers friendships, in a non-judgemental way, and offers the real solution to their brokenness.
No, I’m not talking about the secular song…I’m talking to you, BROKENHEARTED MOTHER! Every day you wake up and learn to be stronger, learn how to ‘deal’ with everything that once was nothing and has become the very weight that wants to pull you back down. Every day you get out of bed, you are a real hero. Every day you look at your loved one and chose to remember one good moment, you are the hero! Every day you decide to forgive the person who brought you to this time in your life, you are the real hero. I’m not one to give myself a pat on the back, because honestly, my strength comes from Lord and without Him, I would be nothing! So, take this moment and remember that every time you get up, get dressed, and learn to live, someone is giving you a standing ovation!